Join beta

In development · iOS & Android

You squat.
The gopnik takes damage.

A workout game where every squat punches a boss from everyday post-Soviet life. Your camera counts every full rep.

Get early access

Free to play. Your video never leaves your phone.

Fight scene: the hero squats at home while the gopnik by the entrance takes −12 damage
Concept art

How it works

Three steps to own the block

  1. A phone on the floor propped against a stack of books

    Phone on the floor

    Lean it against the wall, then take two steps back. It needs to see all of you, cap to slippers.

  2. The hero in a tracksuit squatting on a rug

    Squat

    The camera counts every rep. Half a squat doesn't count, and the enemy will notice.

  3. The gopnik knocked back by a hit, with a comic burst and −12

    The enemy takes damage

    Every rep lands a hit. When their patience runs out, they give up: let you pass, hand over loot or go do their own workout.

Push-ups, lunges, jumping jacks and planks too. Fights take 3-7 minutes, no equipment needed.

Meet the block

Tired of chickens and goblins? Meet the Gatekeeper.

Tap an enemy: one tap, one squat.

  • Yo, which block you from? Squat down, let's talk.

    Patience

    Squatting Gopnik

    The Courtyard · lvl 1Weak to: squats

    Been squatting here since 2007. Never once stood up.

  • Where do you think YOU'RE going? Wipe your feet!

    Patience

    The Gatekeeper

    The Stairwell · lvl 5Weak to: lunges

    Forty years at her post. Your keycard means nothing to her.

  • Ticket. Please. Now.

    Patience

    The Fare Inspector

    The Commuter Line · lvl 10Weak to: lunges

    Can smell a fare dodger three cars away.

  • Sit down. Just for a minute. Or a year.

    Patience

    The Great Couch

    Weekly bossWeak to: squats

    He's not evil. He's just very, very comfortable.

Plus 20 more enemies and 7 weekly bosses, from the Bread-Tax Pigeon to the HOA Overlord.

Notice

Your video never leaves your phone

Reps are counted right on your device. We don't record, store or upload your video. A fight clip is saved only if you tap Save yourself. We do collect game stats, with no picture or sound.

Block management

Beta

Join the beta waitlist

We open Kazakhstan, Uzbekistan, Kyrgyzstan, Armenia and Georgia first, then everywhere else. People on the list get into the beta first.

  • Early beta access on iPhone and Android
  • An email on launch day in your country
  • No spam: just the beta and the launch
Two heroes in tracksuits holding carpet beaters
The Gatekeeper

Not so fast. Sign up first.

Your phone

By tapping the button you agree to the privacy policy. We only email about the beta and the launch, and every email has an unsubscribe link.

FAQ

Asked around the block

When does it come out?

The beta for people on the list starts this winter. Launch is planned for early 2027: Kazakhstan, Uzbekistan, Kyrgyzstan, Armenia and Georgia first, everywhere else a couple of weeks later.

Is it free?

Yes. The Courtyard, the Stairwell, the Commuter Line, the Bazaar, every exercise, clips and the weekly boss are free forever. A paid membership unlocks the far zones, members-only enemies and cosmetics. Prices are set per region.

Is the camera filming me? Where does the video go?

Nowhere. The camera only counts your reps, and that happens right on your phone. The video is never recorded or uploaded. During a fight the screen shows a stick figure, not you, by default. A clip is saved only if you tap Save. We do collect game stats and crash reports, with no picture: see the privacy policy.

Which exercises, and what do I need?

Squats, push-ups, lunges, jumping jacks and planks. You need your phone and a couple of meters by a wall, no equipment. A fight takes 3-7 minutes. If something hurts, stop: the enemy will wait.

Which phones and languages?

iPhone and Android, and we test on budget phones too. Languages: Russian and English. The English version is written with its own jokes, not translated word for word.